About

On the evening of January 11, 2016, at approximately 6:05 pm, the unthinkable happened and our family was changed forever.  For that is the date our oldest son, Hans, was killed in a car crash at the end of our driveway.

The next day would have been his twenty-first birthday.

The purpose of this blog is to honor the Lord Jesus Christ in the context of our grief after losing Hans.  We declare that the true and living God is real, that He is good, and that he is worthy to be praised.  We hope to be an encouragement to other parents who are walking through the valley of child loss; to rejoice with them that do rejoice, and to weep with them that weep.  (Romans12:15)

We desire to remember Hans’ life, to share those memories with others, and to draw every bit of good we can from this painful season in our own lives.  Our prayer is that because Hans lived, many might be brought to a saving knowledge of Hans’ Savior: God the Son, Jesus Christ.

Because knowing Jesus is everything.

Fifteen Words of Hope

Click here to find out who Jesus is.

How Can I Know God?

The Bible in Your Language

Hans Nolywaika Memorial Website

The London Baptist Confession of Faith of 1689

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About the Author

A mail-order bride, Kim Nolywaika has been married to Manfred Nolywaika since 1989.  They live in a little off-grid log house somewhere south of Fairbanks, Alaska and have four grown children.  Two live at home, one lives in western Alaska, and one is living in Heaven.

The Nolywaikas have enjoyed most of the usual Alaska pastimes at one time or another: hunting, fishing, gardening, water hauling, wood-cutting, fixing stuff (again), and spending time together.

Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it…   Psalm 127:1

jan-3-2016-2

37 replies »

  1. I’ve read through all the comments and I am speechless as to what I could add or say to give you comfort. I am deeply sorry for your loss. Just know people are seeing Jesus in you, and your example of trusting Him is powerful. You are pointing others to the only true source of comfort and hope. Thank you for sharing your story, Kim. Keep looking to Jesus as you have been. We all grieve in different ways. Grief is the price for loving, and you love well. Keep writing. Blessings to you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Kim, I am so sorry for your loss. Our children are precious gifts from God, so when we lose one of them it is horrible. But, I am so glad that your trust is in Almighty God and in Jesus Christ, God the Son. For, only in Him can we find purpose and meaning through it all in order to keep going on. Thank you for your testimony here. I pray God continues to heal your broken hearts and to use you mightily for his kingdom in sharing the gospel of our salvation to a lost and dying world. God bless you! Sue

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Dear Kim, I’m so sorry to read this heartbreaking news. But I thank God for using you and your family to be a comfort to others who are hurting, especially other parents who have lost a child. May the Lord Jesus remain ever close to each one of you.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Kim, I cannot even imagine a loss so great. My heart hurts with your family. God is so faithful to bring comfort in our desperate times and I can see by your site that He is so very near to you. I pray His continual blessings to you as you pass on His faithfulness to others. Dee

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Hi Kim, I am sorry for your loss. It must have been so hard for you to face the reality of having your beloved son snatched so cruelly from you like that. I am comforted by the fact that you have a personal relationship with Jesus and I am looking forward to reading more of your post. God bless.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Bless you Kim. My wife and I lost our only child many years ago. He WS never born but we named him Joseph.
    On a number of occasions Daddy has allowed us to see him. He I now a part of the great cloud of witnesses and is cheering us on in Jesus. In expect the same is true for your Hans.
    May the peace of Daddy rule in our hearts and minds in everything we endure through out this life until we see Jesus face to face. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Kim I feel so much for you, I’m crying as I write this, I never got to hold my 7 Babies, 3 were Stillborn and the others died at almost 5 mths gestation, I know as it will be for you and Son, we will all be reunited in Heaven but my grieve I feel at the time was different to yours now, although heartbreaking as I was not a Christian and I had no Hope, it must be so much greater to have known and Loved your Son in all of his Childhood and Teenage years up to 21, so many cherished memories.

    Yes when our Loved ones who have departed are in our Hearts we are not really far apart but we do miss sharing our lives together with them and it takes time to let go but I know Kim from what you have shared that you have no doubt that The Lord understands and is very close to you and your Family and it is confirmed in the Scriptures below, others care too and will be there for you when needed, God will send them.

    Isaiah 43:1-3 – Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name you are mine. When you go through deep waters and great trouble I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty you will not drown! When you walk through the fire of oppression you will not be burned up the flames will not consume you. For I am The LORD, your God, The Holy One of Israel your Saviour.”

    Jeremiah 29 :11-12 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you says the LORD, thoughts of Peace and not of evil, to give you a Future and a Hope.

    Lamentations 3: 33 For God doth not afflict willingly nor grieve the Children of Men.

    Christian Love Always – Anne.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Anne, thank you for sharing your story with us and for these scriptures to encourage me. You have endured much sorrow, but you have much treasure waiting for you in Heaven. How wonderful to have the Sure Hope of seeing these precious ones someday. May the Lord hold you close until we see our dear ones again.

      Liked by 2 people

  8. Hello Kim! God just put you on my heart right now. In searching for a particular word He wants conveyed, it is really knowing Jesus Christ, Himself, in His entirety, living in you – along with the Holy Spirit and our Father (e.g. John 14:23). (It is so astounding! We can only apprehend that by His Spirit, e.g. 1 Cor ch 2).

    My only further encouragement is just BE who He has already made you: the woman with the alabaster jar at His feet, pouring herself out on Him.

    God bless you, sister!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Kim, you are on my heart, in my thoughts and prayers…all of your family, especially today and tomorrow…loving, comforting hugs being sent to you in spirit…<3 other than that, there simply are no.words.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I, too, have found my Christian faith to be a great source of help, comfort and strength. I know my daughter remains with me, within my body, within my heart and within my mind.
    We also share our sorrow of being bereaved parents with Jesus’ mother Mary. We often forget that Mary was human, like us, and so we can turn to her for comfort. Perhaps, she is our first Compassionate Friend or can be if we so wish it.

    Liked by 1 person

      • I to have thought a lot about her. I posted on FB after my son passed April 20, 2016
        For now I know how Mary felt
        When Jesus died on the Cross
        For only those who’ve lost a child
        Knows this pain of loss.

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Your writing is beautiful, Kim, and your faith is gorgeous. Thank you for testifying well of an trustworthy God and an unfailing Lover of our souls. You are walking through the dark valley, but your faith is blazing a powerful victory, accomplishing something in the spiritual realm that will dazzle you when you see it someday. Thank you for strengthening the Body and for advancing the Kingdom.

    God is giving to you “the treasures hidden in the darkness–secret riches” (Is. 45:3.)

    Liked by 1 person

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