The Fear of Forgetting

Yes, it’s normal. We are terrified of forgetting them. Afraid that if we let go of that horrible moment when our child died, that it will be like they didn’t exist at all. The pain is tremendous, but early in our grief we can’t seem to help wanting to stay right there in the past…… Continue reading The Fear of Forgetting

The Most Important Thing

While he was yet speaking, there came also another, and said, Thy sons and thy daughters were eating and drinking wine in their eldest brother’s house: And, behold, there came a great wind from the wilderness, and smote the four corners of the house, and it fell upon the young men, and they are dead;…… Continue reading The Most Important Thing

Is Jesus in Your Boat?

And when he was entered into a ship, his disciples followed him. And, behold, there arose a great tempest in the sea, insomuch that the ship was covered with the waves: but he was asleep. Matthew 8:23-24Had the disciples put out to sea without Christ’s bidding, they would not have had the same reason to…… Continue reading Is Jesus in Your Boat?

Forward

Here is another short excerpt from my book Never Ceasing: God’s Faithfulness in Grief Forward. That is the direction I need to be moving. Forward is where our son is. Forward is where I will see my Savior, face to face. Moving forward is not the same as moving on. Moving on is putting the…… Continue reading Forward

The First Week

Here is another short excerpt from my book Never Ceasing: God’s Faithfulness in Grief It is the most trying week of my life—physically exhausting, emotionally grueling. I am thankful for everyone who comes to pay their respects and make sure we eat well. I am thankful for every single gift that is sent to us…… Continue reading The First Week

The Safest Place for Him to Be

Here is another short excerpt from my book Never Ceasing: God’s Faithfulness in Grief I start preparing for a trip to the hospital. I put our healthcare ministry card in my purse and also an extra set of keys to Hans’s car in case he has left for the hospital already and has his keys…… Continue reading The Safest Place for Him to Be

Life’s Last Quarter Mile

Hans drives to the highway, presumably listening to the engine. He travels the last quarter mile of life’s road, planned for him by God before the foundation of the world. He drives his car down the dirt driveway where he learned to walk and to run and to ride a bike. I often wonder what…… Continue reading Life’s Last Quarter Mile

The Place of Departure

Over the course of that day, the day of the crash, Hans drives at least four times over the spot from which he will leave us for Heaven. It was to that very spot, at the end of our driveway, that Hans would cajole me into taking him as a little boy so he could…… Continue reading The Place of Departure

Young Man Alone

Late Saturday afternoon, the boys built a fire on the creek ice out behind our house to burn up branches from the trees they felled that day. As I washed the dishes, I watched them from my kitchen window. I saw Hans sitting alone at the edge of the darkness on a small pile of…… Continue reading Young Man Alone

My Book is Finished

My book, Never Ceasing: God’s Faithfulness in Grief, is now available for purchase. Buy Now I began writing in early 2016 just after Hans left us for Heaven and started publishing this blog in September of that year. Just about five years later (almost to the day) my book is now ready to share in…… Continue reading My Book is Finished

The Story of a Mother

A fairytale by Hans Christian Andersen “Young woman embracing a thorn bush”Kay Rasmus Nielsen (March 12, 1886 – June 21, 1957)Denmark A mother sat by her little child; she was very sad, for she feared it would die. It was quite pale, and its little eyes were closed, and sometimes it drew a heavy deep…… Continue reading The Story of a Mother

From a Secret Place

I am very pleased and thankful that a revised version of my blog post “Four” (originally published October 3, 2016) has been included in the June 2021 “Gardens” issue of ArtAscent Art & Literature Journal. It is our first summer without him, an astonishingly beautiful day, and a Sunday, which makes it worse. I step…… Continue reading From a Secret Place

The Ministry of Sorrow | Tim Challies

“We should not long to suffer, but we should be willing to. We should not desire loss, but we should consent to bow the head, to bow the heart, to bow the knee, and to be a blessing to God’s people in whatever sorrows God ordains for us. When we surrender ourselves to God, we…… Continue reading The Ministry of Sorrow | Tim Challies