Light Show

Hans was a flashlight fanatic.  This, of course, led to a rechargeable battery habit.  He did not want to get caught on a highway emergency call without a good light.  Car repairs and other work at home often had to be done in the dark as well. So, not unexpectedly, this past Christmas Hans gave…… Continue reading Light Show


Several years ago, high winds snapped a large spruce tree about half way up its trunk, sending the upper part of the tree crashing down onto the roof of our house as we slept. Damage was minimal, the roof was repaired, and the tree was cut up and hauled away for firewood. But the stump,…… Continue reading Tenacious

Old Yeller Truck

The other day I went to the yellow pickup to see if Hans left anything in there.  Sure enough, there was his Forestry Department issued clothing from when he worked last summer helping out for few days on the wildfire south of Nenana.  It was all folded up neat as a pin and piled on…… Continue reading Old Yeller Truck


This summer, our first without Hans, has been like no other.  In addition to Hans being gone, the rest of the family have been away from home for much of the summer work season. And it is very quiet. One of the first things that struck me after Hans went to be with Jesus, was…… Continue reading Racket


“How are you doing?” Why does this question make me uncomfortable, almost panicky? It seems like a simple question to which I ought to be able to give a simple answer. But, in truth, it is a very complicated question. There is no short answer. No easy multiple choice answer other than “all of the…… Continue reading Trainwreck

The Facts

In the early months of grieving for our son, sorrow, longing and anguish felt like a connection to him.  They were a sort of conduit, a frantic grasping for nearness.  To remember him was to be with him.  All conscious thought was focused on getting to him – right now.  To weep was to hold…… Continue reading The Facts


Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit. John 12:24 Look at the seed of any plant: birch, fireweed, dandelion, wheat. The seed in no way resembles the mature plant it will become: a…… Continue reading Called


“At first, I was shaken, but looking up, I recovered my strength…” George Whitefield Forward. That is the direction I need to be moving. Forward is where our son is. Forward is where I will see my Savior face to face. Moving forward is not the same as moving on. Moving on is putting the…… Continue reading Joysorrow