The Nearness of God

Grieving is difficult, exhausting work that can become counterproductive if indulged in overmuch. There comes a time when sorrow and anguish are not enough anymore. Not that it wears off, or grieving gets easier. It is just that I have come to an awareness that sorrow is not getting me anywhere.

I see that my tears will not bring Hans back. The churning rawness begins to level off, not because the pain is less, but because I am too weary to cry. The sorrow gets quieter, burrows deeper, becomes part of me rather than something I do battle with. Whereas once I thought my heart would explode with pain, I now feel it threatening to implode, to collapse under the stealthy grip of Sadness.

But then, little by little, I find I can smile occasionally while remembering. Instead of seeing empty spaces everywhere, spaces where Hans should be, I begin to see God’s hand. The frantic grasping subsides as I look up in wonder, knowing Hans is up there.

Slowly, I realize the Lord has provided a better connection to Hans than sorrow and grief, a connection based on the facts as they are—not life as it was. I see with the eyes of faith that God has provided Himself.

And the fires of sorrow burn away the chaff of ease, revealing, as only sorrow can, the nearness of God.

-Excerpt from my book Never Ceasing: God’s Faithfulness in Grief

Never Ceasing book cover

2 thoughts on “The Nearness of God

  1. Thank you, Kim. This is beautiful because I can relate. Our Father fills the void He leaves when He takes our loved ones. More emptiness brings more of His fulness. Love and blessings as you continue to minister through your loss and faith to others.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.