Short excerpts from ‘Never Ceasing: God’s Faithfulness in Grief’ by Kim Nolywaika
Hans spent most of his life right here at home in the house he grew up in. Of course, he went places and did things; he spent his first birthday in California while we were there visiting family. But, other than that, he never left Alaska. He never “got his own place”; never had to …
Continue reading In My Father’s House
We sang ‘Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing’ at Hans’s memorial service. Surprisingly, I was able to sing, too, though my heart was splintering into little pieces. It was important to me that I sing that day. I wanted to do it for the Lord. I wanted to do it for Hans. The title of …
Continue reading Streams of Mercy, Never Ceasing
And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us: And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him. 1 John 5:14-15 Every prayer I have ever uttered …
Continue reading According to His Will
When just a small boy, God saved Hans from the penalty and power of sin, assuring him a place in Heaven based on faith in Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection. So, when we say we will see Hans again, our level of assurance is quite high. But what about the parent who does not have …
Continue reading Is My Child in Heaven?
Bouncing around at the base of the hill, across the river that lay frozen between the fireworks techs and us spectators on the dock, was a light. A flashlight. A very bright flashlight. I saw the stream of light widen and play upon the hillside. Then the beam narrowed into a tightly focused square-shaped beam. …
So, how can I be so confident that I will see my son again? Is it because he was “a good boy,” was “never in any trouble,” “was no worse than anyone else?” Is it because his family goes to church every Sunday and Hans never missed a meeting unless he was sick? Is it …
Continue reading The Resurrection and the Life
The roots of the stump passed right through where the rose bush grew. Collateral damage. I knew it would be useless to argue. He dug up the lush and beautiful rose bush and we stuck it in a barrel of water. Finally, all the roots of the stump were out, leaving a crater about five …
Continue reading The Rose Bush
Most of my book was written very early in my grief. These excerpts are not how it is for me now. Time has softened the blow and the Lord has carried me through the worst of it. I share for the sake of those who are just beginning life without their loved one. ~~~ "I …
Why does the sound of the wind break my heart?It carries away the long-ago laughterOf yesterday’s childrenAnd flings it beyond my reachThe wind runs without a careAlong trails blazed by my mighty hunterBrushing over the fields of your boyhoodAs if your absence does not matterYesterday’s gentle breeze returns empty-handedFierce and without mercyIts icy sting freezes …
Continue reading The Sound of the Wind
Grieving is difficult, exhausting work that can become counterproductive if indulged in overmuch. There comes a time when sorrow and anguish are not enough anymore. Not that it wears off, or grieving gets easier. It is just that I have come to an awareness that sorrow is not getting me anywhere. I see that my …
Continue reading The Nearness of God
From my book, Never Ceasing: God's Faithfulness in Grief
Our God would not allow this terrible pain unless he had a very, very good reason. I trust Him for that. There is nothing else. I trust Him because He is good and because He does what He says He will do. He is real, and He sees our pain. We follow Him, not because …
Continue reading Why Trust God? Why Follow Him?
Here is another short excerpt from my book Never Ceasing: God’s Faithfulness in Grief Forward. That is the direction I need to be moving. Forward is where our son is. Forward is where I will see my Savior, face to face. Moving forward is not the same as moving on. Moving on is putting the …
Here is another short excerpt from my book Never Ceasing: God’s Faithfulness in Grief It is the most trying week of my life—physically exhausting, emotionally grueling. I am thankful for everyone who comes to pay their respects and make sure we eat well. I am thankful for every single gift that is sent to us …
Continue reading The First Week
Here is another short excerpt from my book Never Ceasing: God's Faithfulness in Grief I start preparing for a trip to the hospital. I put our healthcare ministry card in my purse and also an extra set of keys to Hans’s car in case he has left for the hospital already and has his keys …
Continue reading The Safest Place for Him to Be
You Can Trust Him 